You know, I can never forget Advercides. No matter what I do. People asked why I need a name tag changer for. This is because they do not know the attachment I have with Advercides. They do not understand how I feel. If changing my name, and being a whole new person could let me forget my ties with Adver, then I shall very well do so.
It is kind of hard to explain in words what Adver really mean to me, and in particular 1 person. I wish things were back to where it left off. I wish all these had never happened. But somehow, it did. It saddened me greatly. And as I grow older each day, I become wiser. A part of me made me realised that it is all part and parcel of life. Things we do not understand happens. Things we do not want to happen will happen. And things that can go wrong, will go wrong, accordng to Murphy's Law.
Inside of me, its so hard to explain. There is always a tug on in my heart. A pull, which is getting stronger as one approaches. This pull leaves a lump in my throat and I find it so hard to grasp or swallow. Painful.
No one will really understand how much I miss them. Yet I do not understand them either. Why did I even bother to shed my tears for them, I ask myself. Perhaps the only way for me to stop crying is to forget about them entirely. And forget about him. What's wrong with me. I am so lost in this mindless child play. Perfectly alright on the outside, but I am in a dire state, a sort of dilemma, and uncontrollable situations on the inside.
The inside hurts the most.
No matter what new family I have now, they will still be my past.
My brother dear, I need a psychiatrist. Badly. I yearn to forget certain stuff, but I can't. It does not want to go away.
Like Foaly would say, "Ya need a mind swipe!"
Friday, December 22, 2006
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little target
Nickname
~ Ena ~
Nationality Thai ( **Kisses for Shopping, no $$ though** )
Interests I adore gaming~ Martial Heroes~, Perfect World and stuff (Old noob) and I love my absolute FPS game - Wolfteam. I love Figure skating and lots of other cool i don't know. I love Lifehouse music, and I think they are great. So are kelly and christina. I love music that can bring tears to my eyes too. :)
Miss Mood Changer~~ my mood varies ( important part of my development ^_^ )
Expertise Designs and graphics, Colors, texture and Computers. Yummy~ brushes, patterns, photoshop, photographs Also makeup, makeup, lots of makeup! Ring me if you need bridal, D&D makeovers
Occupation Graduate of the one and only Singapore Polytechnic Diploma in Media and communications Freelance Host, WebDesigner, Makeup Artist (MUA), Full-time Customer Service officer
Industry
Media and Public Relations, Aviation Authority
I am a 21 years old graduate of Singapore Polytechnic year 2009 I do feel like picking up the books again but not for something of my line - preferably Dermatogoly or Skin Science. I <3 Science. I don't know why I took Mass Comms.
I want to travel around the world with the love of my life <3 My oyhero ~ and do everything before I die.
Stuff I like
Black Clothes, any Music~, Makeup~, Cameras, Books~, Computers~, and a Nice Big house. ^^ Maybe 100 Billion Dollars is good too. I don't know. Life's too long.
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